What do your clothes and hair say about you?
Posted Under: Women, Beauty and Fashion
Our society as a whole tends to be obsessed with all things youthful - this information is not new. Women tend to wear the brunt of this bias most of the time, particularly in their working life. I spoke with Trish Perry from Ultimate Image Impact about this recently, who works with women on feeling great about themselves - inside and out.
"Watching Today Tonight recently, I received a harsh reminder to the extent that older people are judged on their appearance in relation to their employability and performance potential. Research has shown that at every meeting we instantly make a psychological assumption about the other person’s age,and this influences all further judgments made about that person. We either think she’s younger, older or the same age as me, or she’s 20, 30, 40 or 50 etc. After all, who wants to employ someone who turns up for work looking tired and might not last out the day, whether you are feeling tired or not.
Our appearances account for 80% of our image and conclusions are drawn about our income earning ability, trustworthiness and stamina by our visual appearance, not our resumes.
What is it that actually makes a woman look older than she really is? The first and most obvious feature is the amount of grey in the hair. Some women age better than others and greying hair can look absolutely stunning. Black hair turning to steel grey is one of them. This can progress right through the “cool” grey tones and all the way to silvery white is very fetching - especially if it is shiny. I suggest you don’t change it. The contrast levels between the hair, skin and eyes is still very high to medium and these ladies wear their age very well, if their skin condition has been preserved and protected.
The most difficult transition is the mousy brown hair colours that grey out. These women generally have a low to medium contrast level and with the advancing years, the contrast levels between hair skin and eyes becomes lower. The skin tends to lose the bloom of youth more readily with the evening out of colour and the process becomes more and more muted. These women, like me, tend to look at least 10 years older than they really are, unless they learn some makeover magic secrets with colour application and authentic looking hair colour changes. The colours to avoid are blue, purple, apricot and pink. Dame Edna is the only one I’ve seen able to carry it off!
There are many shades and tones of grey. In my opinion it’s not the amount of snow on the roof, but the fire that burns below that matters. However this is not so in the business world. The case for going blonde is an interesting one as blonde is seen as youthful - not all blonde works on older women. To be blonde and look youthful, you’ll need to choose a neutral to light golden shade in a medium length. Do not go ‘light and bright’ as this is too young and looks inappropriate unless you are naturally cool toned with cool eyes and skin. A colour consultant will help you there.
Grey hair showing at the roots on hair dyed badly, is often worse than someone, especially a woman, who is grey all over. It is a little realised fact that as we age our skin gets paler and cooler and our eyes lose their intensity. This is why many purchase hair dyes that no longer suit their colouring. It’s different for women than it is for men. Men can grey out at the temples and beyond, lose their hair and even have a bit of a pudgy belly, but women don’t receive the same tolerances. A man’s greying hair certainly does age him, but with age, comes an air of distinction and maturity if the hair is well styled and the grooming is impeccable. This is not the case with women, especially a woman who is overweight or a little heavier than her peers. In this case, as unfair as it is, an overweight woman needs to be better groomed, beautifully made up and have a very confident persona. She needs to be better than her younger sisters in every other aspect to be able to carry it off.
What to do?
Mature aged women have an enormous bank of skills and experience to offer. In order for this to be utilised and financially acknowledged also, a mature woman will have to face the reality that her appearance may be in need of an update. Let’s keep ‘em guessing and not sabotage our own opportunities.
I’ve seen some beautiful mature aged women who take a great deal of pride in their appearance and with not much effort, they take years off their age. Ladies, there are some amazing low-cost, non invasive, nonsurgical “cut and polish” treatments available. Stay grey if you like too. There are some beautiful grey “colours” to behold and you can still look wonderful for your age.
For instance, a new, easy to maintain hair do, a manicure, nail polish application and even a foot pedicure will make you look and feel a million dollars. Learn to apply age appropriate makeup to suit your colouring, refresh and pamper your skin with a facial, wear colours that will flatter you and update your glasses and jewellery, to flatter your face shape. Discover how to wear “no fuss” collars and neck lines, and styles to flatter your figure. Start a fitness regime, even if it’s walking for 30 minutes a day, swimming ,yoga or lifting some weights. Persevering will make it into an easy and enjoyable routine - that makes you feel good about yourself. Before you know it, everything else goes on hold until you’ve done it!
The Bottom Line: As a beautiful friend has told me on several occasions, it’s all about attitude and you need to have joy in your life.
Trish is the founder of Ultimate Image Impact, Biz Image, and Big Beautiful Women™. She is an Internationally Accredited Colour and Image Consultant (Association of Image Consultants International), and an Accredited NLP Practitioner (International Society of NeuroSemantics).
What are your thoughts?
As a woman, do you feel judged for your age. How so? How does ageing affect you? Do you do anything to counteract the ageing process?
Reader Comments
There is no doubt in my mind it is much harder for women as they age. However it is really up to the individual woman how much she focuses on the negativity- rather than rising to the challenge ahead of her. We can all do our bit to re-educate society but really a women’s beauty comes from the inside out and no-one can take that away from here, whatever her age.
When I was 35 I decided to change careers. I was unhappy and really wanted to do something different.I was so shocked going into the employment market and being repeatedly told I was too old to change careers. In the end I found a great job with a wonderful boss who was willing to take a chance on me. I thought at the time how sad it was that people have to be so ageist, because what makes a person interesting is their ability to challenge themselves and have the courage to do this all through their lives. Being told you are too old for anything at 35 is ridiculous. You need to believe in yourself and rise above other peoples perceptions of how you should look and act for your age.
I think I’m getting better and better as I age and I love celebrating beautiful women no matter how old or young they are. I even started a facebook group called “I Refuse To Participate In Our Ageist Society”. What this means is that I simply don’t tell anyone how old I am. Ever. (Many women seem to avoid the age issue after a certain point so I thought I may as well start now!) I smile and say “How old do you want me to be?” It somehow means something - there’s an instant judgement there (you look good for your age, you’re too young etc). This is insane! Age is only a state of mind and I want to be young forever!
I don’t like the term “ageing”. I prefer the term “getting older”. Getting older is a fact of life, male and woman can not escape; we add one year every year to our birth date until we die. Getting older doesn’t necessarily mean you are “ageing”. My friends say that I am like a bottle of French wine, I get better with age! In many ways, it is true. I am more at peace with life and enjoy sharing my new found wisdom and grounded energy. If anything, getting older has made me more disciplined in my exercise and diet habits, more aware of my grooming. I update my wardrobe and make up regularly, using colours and style which flatter my face and current body shape (we all remember purchasing a little black & white number 2 sizes too small in the hope we just might fit into it??). Of course, I am playing hide and seek with my handful of grey hair and fine lines but overall, what really works for me is pampering once in a while what I like the most about myself. All good.